Reading some of the things your mom has said to you gave me shivers. It’s eerie how similar our mothers are.
My Mom has radically changed her approach. Now she sends me sermons that she has written for me. She doesn’t talk about me being gay anymore. It isn’t good, but it’s kind of better.
I miss the way things used to be.
I was in the theater watching Toy Story 3 when I got this text from Mom:
Hey honey are you working? Can you call me when you have a minute?
This always makes me nervous. I asked what was wrong and she said:
Probably nothing. Just need to tell you about some test results. Very strong possibility that it’s nothing. I told Bart and wanted you to know.
I love you. :)
Things are getting better.
I’m very happy for you! It makes me smile to see that you are so happy with your new found faith. But when you say things like, “I will not rest until you two turn your lives around” it scares me. If you want to keep pushing your religious beliefs on me, I will push my beliefs back on you. And I know that both of us are obviously set in our ways and it is not going to get us anywhere.
In the quest to make my family perfect my parents are throwing away something beautiful. My brothers and I are great kids and we love our parents very much. We are doing well. We are healthy. It breaks my heart that what I am isn’t good enough.
My mom and dad are coming to visit me for the day tomorrow. I don’t want to give them an ultimatum, but I need to be up front with them. They can have me this way, or not at all.
I watched a movie today: “The Kids Are All Right.” It was incredible. I guess it must have hit home a little hard because I cried for like half the movie. Broken families are all too common.
I know you could be sending me tons of stuff that you have found on the Internet……thank you for not doing that.
Please click on this link and read one person’s story. Just one more time….and I won’t send you anything else.
There is one word that I want to leave with you John, it is “Ask.” Ask Jesus if this is his plan for you, ask him if there is another way. Ask him into your heart. Ask Him to show you His Glory. Ask him to be with you every minute of every day. Ask him to show you His love.
You don’t have to read this, but maybe this one story will touch your heart like it did mine.
I know you aren’t mine….you are God’s and I am giving you over to him.
Pray the Lord’s Prayer every day….Put your name in it.
I love you.
Thanks for the feedback!
Sometimes it can be really hard to keep doing this. I love my family more than anything in the world, but it feels a lot like I’m walking back into a house that’s burning down to save them.